1) Timing

Timing can refer to the overall speed which people talk, as well as stresses, emphases and pauses they choose to make. Native speakers vary their timing between words, sentences and phrases based on a variety of things:

* Who they are talking to:

If someone is talking to a friend then they are more likely to speak to express how they are feeling. If they are feeling sad they are likely to slow down, have pauses between words and sentences and stress words that explain how they are feeling. If someone is talking to a boss or a superior then they are unlikely to speak in a neutral, more formal manner. Many non-native English speakers speak too fast. This can be due to nerves as well as the fact that their own mother tongue language is spoken at a fast tempo. A good idea is to listen to the speed of the person you are talking to in English and try to match them.

* What they are feeling/ their mood:

People change their timing based on emotions. We already talked about how sadness can slow down a person’s timing. Anger can make people speak faster as well as stress and emphasis their words. You can usually tell if someone likes you by the amount of emotion they express when they’re talking. Western workers and bosses can like you, but still sound un-emotive. This is usually because in the Western workplace emotional relationships are generally not considered to have such importance. In fact, it is considered professional to speak to people without emotion. This is why Western people in workplaces can be confusing for other cultures. They think that Western people are trying to be nice, then they stop suddenly. Most Western people who want a work/ professional relationship will not ask many details about your life and will not share many details emotionally.

* What they are talking about/ what they know about it:

The topic is important. If you don’t sound emotional about something everyone else is emotional about, then some ignorant people may think that you don’t care. They may not know how difficult it is to speak another language. Practice like an actor trying to change your timing and stress/ emphasis. For instance if you are agreeing with someone and you want to say “That’s awful”. You may change your timing to stress the syllable “aw” in “awful”, making it stronger and longer to express emotion.

2) Intonation

Words, sentences and phrases naturally range between low, middle and high. Each native speaker expresses tonation differently based on:

* Who they are talking to:

Sometimes it is important to agree, but not express too much emotion- like discussed above in professional relationships. For instance, if there is some major news headline which everyone is talking about, then your boss or co-workers may briefly mention this to make conversation and to be polite. They won’t want an overly emotional response. So emphasising the “aw” in “awful” would not be necessary. If you did emphasis the “aw” then they may pull away, thinking that you want to engage in a long conversation or that you are too emotional for work.

* What they are feeling/ their mood:

This ties into who you are talking to. Again, expressing feelings needs to be appropriate to who you are talking to. Most ESL speakers have trouble remembering to vary their intonation accordingly. For instance, a response such with rising tone on “ful” for the word “awful” may tell native speakers that you don’t take them seriously or that you don’t care. Native speakers may not understand that your mother tongue language has many rising tones, especially on the last syllable of words.

* The environment they are in:

Intonation changes according to who is speaking, where they are and who is listening. See how intonation changes at work functions. When work people are relaxing and socialising with their colleagues they phrase things a little bit differently and show some more emotion.

3) Shorten things where possible

A lot of native speakers like to shorten their words, sentences and phrases to save time. This is seen in a variety of environments and can vary based on the relationships between people. Unfortunately, many ESL textbooks do not teach people how to do this. You can improve yourself by developing good listening skills and keeping a notebook of your observations. Let’s look at some different ways of shortening things based on your relationship to the person.

*Your family or friends– “Bring me a water… please?” (Personal/ shortened)

* Your boss– “Would you mind bringing me some water please? (Long/ un-shortened/ formal version)

* A child or your son/ daughter– “Darling, can you get me a water?” (Personal/ shortened)

– Notice how formal textbook language like “a glass of water” is replaced with “a water” or “some water”. Notice how the structure of the sentence is less formal for personal relationships, but for work relationships it remains formal. This is important if you are trying to make friends with someone who is a native speaker. The language you use to communicate with them will tell them if you want to be friends or not. Being more formal with someone who you want to be friends with may make them feel like you are trying distance yourself from them.

4) Don’t worry too much about your accent

Many Western countries are classified “multicultural”, accepting citizens from many different countries. Speaking to someone from a country like America, England, Canada or Australia- you shouldn’t be afraid of speaking with an accent. What people want to hear is good, clear pronunciation. If you are born in a multicultural country, then developing a “local” accent is natural and given. However, if you have grown up with a non-English speaking background and want to sound British or American (etc); then it’s a very difficult task and often a waste of time to try. Teachers and ESL schools who tell people differently are usually exaggerating to try to get them to sign up for unnecessary classes. Relax and be yourself because adopting an accent can sound fake and lead to other communicative mistakes.

5) Develop your pronunciation

Pronunciation isn’t always so easy. It can be hard enough to remember words, and construct sentences let alone worry about pronunciation. Pronunciation is developed slowly, from an understanding of phonetics. If you have trouble with phonetics you are not alone. Finding video demonstrations, asking a native speaker friend and looking for diagrams can help you understand the many complex aspects of pronunciation including; air flow, lip and mouth shapes, your teeth and your tongue.

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